I've been releasing music, with no "machine"-based promotion or public fanfare, for free, for a little over a decade. Dare I call it peer-pressure, but I got in the music business more than once. I have not benefited in any way, shape or form. Others have, and to this day do not show appreciation or support. What I was able to get for myself was either stolen or "lost".
No matter who I am on paper (from Charles Hamilton Houston to Charles Hamilton the "rapper/super-producer"), I do not and have not made money from my music business "opportunities". I have a legitimate lawsuit against MANY, from embezzlement to defamation of character. Such details are why I am a "different" person. Yes. I have done and said insulting things. And all of what I said and did was in defense of this (labeled) borderline child who became a man named Charles Hamilton. With NO ONE else in defense. The ONLY other defender is no longer living (my mother).
My listeners, point blank, are spoiled, with blaring and glaring ignorance to the entire process. They expect me to be "fly" and "clean", not even knowing what they mean. I am not P. Diddy or Ma$e, I do not wear shiny suits OR Gucci, and I am not interested in "the scene". I am purely a musician, and I have a story, mission, goals and messages I share, want to share and have shared with generations of yesteryear and the future.
I am disappointed with... really everyone. The EXACT thing you "stand up against" is what you expect me to be for the success you "believe" I deserve.
My most recent frustration (which led to this post) is an email I got from my website server. I am unable to pay for www.seiaich.com, both the domain and site itself. Mind you, I am selling 75% of my catalog, remastered, on the site. Still, folks ask me to put my music on streaming services. The likelihood of liability (due to samples) is increased, and I already faced a legal issue with Macy Gray's team because of Intervention. Outside of that, I only get DECIMALS of PENNIES when my music is played on streaming services. THIS FACT, OUTSIDE of the TRUTH that there is digital branding on each song/soundbyte placed on streaming services.
So let's recap:
The free music I slaved over to release to ANYONE WILLING TO LISTEN is (a) negatively criticized for its sound [despite the BACKBREAKING work on the details], (b) available for a low price on MY website to stream [streaming is free on my site] AND purchase [I get 100% of profits] yet disregarded, (c) being requested to put on the modern-day brainwashing machine and (d) is being misused and manipulated by mainstream media/music to produce pretty much everything out.
On some street shit, fuck you all and take offense to ANY money I make with corporate (read: WHITE) people. On some conscious shit, I gave MY ALL... JUST AS I SAID I WOULD ON STAFF DEVELOPMENT... not only to provide excellent music, but to ACTUALLY be there for folks... of all ages... yet you still want to be part of "the wave" or want me to be a part of it. As a musician, I am in the same league as Louis Armstrong, Thelonious Monk, Phyllis Hyman... MANY others. The ignorance of "the people" and my desire to make people aware of... shit, THEMSELVES, has forced me into alienation. As a Negro, I am torn between ...well, damn. I'm torn. I'm in Harlem now. Maybe being so in love with Harlem blocked me from seeing the toils of Harlem.
Harlem is Charles Hamilton broken down and welded together. Am I supposed to feel good about it? Either people know who I am and walk past me with whatever reservations, Harlem is being kept from knowing about me, or they don't like me. IN EITHER SITUATION, my heart breaks from block to avenue, EVERY DAY.
Charles Hamilton is on strike.
A.D.H.C. is postponed indefinitely.
Loser Radio will not air.
Fine. I'll release "your favorite classics" on streaming services. Just know that the bitterness you taste in the previous sentence is indeed there.
I don't know how hurt I am. But love and my love won't permit me to go OFF.
I have nothing more to say. Don't expect any new music unless someone leaks whatever I send them.
I am furious, hurt, and tired of being used by people of whom don't even know the extent of which I love them, without them even opening their mouth to say something to anger, hurt or use me.
So, thank you.
Oh. You've been fooled by Brooklyn girls. Watch out when you're in the hood, and be careful who you meet online.