Let me get to the point, early. I just tried to carve (a pyramid) into my arm, and everything felt horrible. Tragically horrible. I reached a depression that legislatively led to carving. Not suicide, not flirting… I just wanna carve right now.
But the pain paralyzed me. The deeper I seeped the blade, the worse I hurt.
I tried y’all. I fought with every fiber in my being to NOT pick up the blade. But it feels pointless now. Is it the meds? I used to have a high pain tolerance. I felt my inner baby hurting. That’s what made me stop. I wanna take this time to thank GENUINE StarChasers. Y’all should’ve came to mind (for me) when o grabbed the blade.
The Bipolar Sunshine has apparently stopped working. My downtrodden mood is literally taking over. Please bear with me. I mean no harm. I just bear pain I never thought… too much.
Father God (in the name of Jesus), show me how to deal with this anvil dropped on my back. You know my heart.
Meds are kicking in HEAVY. I’ll be on later
%CH. PeacePeace, yall…
