Here is a long overdue post to and about y'all... no words minced, no pretty presentation.
...
I've been insecure since the day we met. I was barely 2 years old, and the only thing I knew (first hand) was my mother and father. You've since put me in a position of power that... I can handle, but you (or your employees) don't make easy. Everyone involved has an ego. From the top of the top to the newcomer(s). But I have never shown my ego to you guys.
Out of fear.
Fear that I would be rejected for bolstering my self-esteem with the mere knowledge that you love me. Fear that the love is in-genuine. Fear that I may not measure up.
So I established myself in The Underground.
I found MUCH talent, great friends, and established morals for myself, being an up-and-coming rapper/producer. Unfortunately, my friends (1) don't measure up to your standards and (2) don't like you. It is fair to say that the Evil Empire spoken of by Rage Against The Machine is EXACTLY why they don't particularly care for my company.
You guys make it obvious that you're around.
With this last case I caught, I find myself disinterested in romance and matters of the heart in general. My grandma and I had a bit of a falling out while I was in jail. I can't get over it, as much as we're back on speaking terms now. Maybe me being medicated is best for the people AROUND me, not me myself.
Which sucks. I can feel certain shifts in my creative energy.
Where you may stand with me today is a mystery. I hope the love is still there. I hope opportunities are still available. I know that, despite turning down a proposition early on, I kept my nose clean. I have called out a few members of our elite society, but only because they weren't playing the game above board. They had their own intentions, and were relying on my "talent" (psyworks) to get what they wanted.
All I know is, I'm good to those who are good to me.
R U STILL DOWN FOR A GOTH?
