[Enter the Hamilton.]: January 2024

A StarChaser's ComingOfAge

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A post shared by Xavier Bennett (@xavierbennett)

Xavier Bennett has been very consistent over the years. I've watched him. Sheeit, we even worked together. IN CLEVELAND! Awkward as it is, to create in a dark place such as Cleveland really proved who I was (to myself). Anyway, this is his latest single. Definitely a feel good record for when the weather breaks (wherever you are, whenever you read this).

Maybe my blog isn't the right place to post this.

Well, nothing but luck, Mr. Bennett!

lol reminds me of my 11th grade biology teacher. Dr. Bennett.

Whatever.

I love my StarChasers.
Bring it if you got it.

#beseated

Black History Month, on a high.

So far, no rappers have been murdered, from all of 2023 and early 2024. A proud fact. Sad, but true. We gotta find a way to air out our grievances with one another without bloodshed. That's why I started Columbine Gang. Reach out to us to make the anthems of war. Because that's what "Beef" is. War, in the poor community. Many people have reached out to get beats so they can do such a thing. And the ones on the receiving end don't beef with me/us because they know they could easily get a beat/song from one of us and shut it down themselves.

A beautiful thing.

I wanna get into this Eminem/Benzino in 2024 thing. I think Em came out SWINGING with his shot, not expecting Benzino to go hard. But in order to successfully battle someone, you have to know their history. Benzino is an MC. He knows what goes into spitting. So I'm not surprised by the quality of his response. Now, Em has to reach back and... well, killshot him. For loyalty's sake, I'm going with Em. But it's not gonna be an easy battle. Someone wrote to me and said I should diss Benzino FOR Eminem. But that would demerit Em's battle history. If I destroy Benzino (which I could), what does that mean to Em?

Slim, holla at me.

To shift gears, I think this Meg and Nicki beef is uncalled for and literally spills into the streets. It's not about who's more famous or who sold more. It's not even about who looks better. It's about street-level loyalty. If you know, you know. But don't think for a minute that there will be a clear winner. Each of them have flaws, each of them have upper hands in the situation. Hopefully, this stays all bars. It could get ugly.

Ladies, keep love alive.

For Black History Month, let's NOT support any rap beef. We all know it gets ugly, and none of these rappers are REALLY gully enough to pop shells. Those that are, are silent and doing POSITIVE things with their time. So yeah. Let's boycott beef all February. Save it for Women's History Month... LMAO!!!!!!

#beseated

New debts

I gotta make this post short, because I have a meeting about my housing in a matter of minutes.

Lately, I've been asking people for money individually. If not online, directly. I understand times are hard, and that I've asked for money in the past. All I can say is thank you, and assure you that when I'm back up, I gotchu.

More to report, but again, I have a meeting soon.

It is what it is, btw...

#beseated

A&R Chasers

This year's music is being curated/A&R'd by StarChasers. A few -Chasers have copies of what I am set to drop, and give me feedback on what the best releases are. Remember... only 12 joints will make it to YouTube.

Even with the tracks being limited, I still have a whole album (Vigilante) and SEVERAL beat tapes to offer. It's all about what will be best received by my StarChasers. And who better to determine such other than StarChasers themselves?

If Im in contact with you (in GENERAL!, God damn), there is a chance you will receive the folder containing this year's King Charles music. And the year is still an infant. Who knows what's to come?

Stay tuned!

#ImOutside!!!

The Sound of Music

Usually, when I have an "episode" and I'm not making music, I blog about it. I find that blogging is therapeutic and I get out thoughts and ideas that normally don't come to me through music. Well, today I reached a critical breaking point.

I was on the phone with Baddie when I thought I heard her say hold on. I didn't speak for 5 minutes. When she threatened to get off the phone, I told her what I thought I heard. It was then I realized I have auditory hallucinations. I noticed it before, but I thought it was my intuition. Or God talking to me.

I realize now that I need the help I'm getting. A lot of things are up to my perception, and I have no room for deception. So to the many people who are relying on my ESP, I need a fucking break. I can still talk to you telepathically, but I need to give my mind a rest. I can't really get into detail about it.

But I prayed about it.

And you know what God said?

Anyone who can't let your mind rest is not worthy of your attention. No matter how bad they need it.

So I don't feel so bad.
I don't work for you.

Jimmy Iovine, Elinor Tatum and Bishop Bonner were my only bosses.

#ImOutside!!!

God and The Goth

Even though I developed my own form of magick, God gave me a gift today. He said, "Charles, you are the EVILEST witch I know. And I love you for it." Now, I know it seems that I have these out-of-this-world, unbelievable conversations with God all the time. And I don't have to explain myself. But who better to have a borderline-psycho conversation with, if not God? I can't talk to StarChasers about this stuff. When I do, they tell me I'm not a witch. God knows my heart. God knows my art.

I finally shared my vision with Magic & Music with my psychiatrist. I never like doing this, because the sessions always end not too long after I reveal. But she saw it. And I saw the little girl her come out. And I acknowledged it. And she acknowledged it, too. She saw my vision. She warned me of the dangers of being disconnected from my art/magic for the sake of performance (ie. being interrupted), and I explained that such is what happened to get me arrested. My peace was disturbed, and nothing kept me pacified.

I think using magick is keeping me from playing #thevictimrole. I can admit when I do wrong. I also stand up for myself. I just been lickin' my wounds the past few years. And I have the right to, if there's nothing else I can do.

I just rocked the world for 2-3 year in a row, using a MacBook and classic Apple earbuds. Let this be motivation and inspiration for generations to come.

It don't take much to rock.

#beseated

An apple a day.

smh I hate starting my blog entries off with negativity. But my hand is forced.

I'm being stalked. I have a woman in my life that is trying to make my life a living hell. If you follow me on Twitter/X, I'm sure you've seen her harass me and my StarChasers about something that is being blown out of proportion. Look. I'm not going back to jail. Especially for you. And when I encourage you to take the matter to a higher force, you decline. So I think you're full of shit. You're the only woman to complain about me being "too rough". And I know more about your sexual exploits than you think I do. So knock it off.

But it's whatever. The next time you tweet some bullshit to me, I'm just gonna let you have it. I gave you a dosage yesterday in the DMs, and believe those DMs were sent to the proper authorities. I'm not afraid of anything I've said, have to say, will say, etc. But you? You need to get your story straight before you throw another accusation out there about me.

It's early. No telling where today will go. I would like a nice j this morning.
Hopefully you guys enjoyed this month's release. Considering all that there is to know about the song (and this year's music in general), it's safe to say I have you guys on a healthy Hamilton music diet.

Stay tuned!

#beseated

cold turkey.

Today I started work on Hamiltonian Magic. It went well! But I reverted back to Witchcraft immediately. Look. I know it's scary. But I'm not tryin to hurt no one. In fact, I'm trying to (a) defend myself and (b) speak on behalf of those in the craft (lost or not). Sorry, Tyler. But if it means we don't speak because I'm claiming the victory of being a Male Witch, so be it.

And you know I care.

See you next month!

#beseated

Daddy's calculations

If my calculations are correct, Danger and Tomorrow Hamilton turn 14 this year! Or, Tomorrow turns 14 this November and Danger turns 14 next June. Regardless, I love them dearly and miss them so. The only thing I can ask for is to see them. I wish their mothers well and for harmony amongst their younger brothers/siblings.

This is a short post.

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"I'm outside!!!"

A New Stranger (a blogpost/poem)

I've been addicted to you since we smiled at each other in high school. You were taken, if I'm not mistaken. Yet thing were never as they seemed. We knew we belonged to each other. All we needed was the opportunity. When the time was right, we indulged. And it was good. But neither of us were ready for the pressure of pleasure.

If I could only have spent the night.

Time passed.
I devolved.

You blossomed.

I'm proud of who you've become. And I can't say I'm bitter. Just lonely. Your taste was the sweetest sangria. Your touch was the wettest silk. I couldn't get you out of my head. Everything reminded me of you. Everyone fell short to your allure.

Hard times.

These times have passed.
I'm not mad at you. I don't hate you. I'm just tired of wanting more of you. I can't have you the way you gave yourself to me. And I can't get mad at that.

All I can do is what I spent today doing.

Moving on.

I moved on.
Don't make this harder on me.

Don't spark these feelings back up. I can't afford the weight.

Just be the Aphrodite I know you to be.
We can still talk. We can still be friends.

But that alleyway is too dark to embark on the path of again.

Thank you.
Thank you for listening.
Thank you for kissing.
Thank you for embracing me.

I'll be on my way, now...

"This morning, King Charles..."

Introducing... Hamiltonian Magic!

(from wikipedia)

In quantum mechanics, the Hamiltonian of a system is an operator corresponding to the total energy of that system, including both kinetic energy and potential energy. Its spectrum, the system's energy spectrum or its set of energy eigenvalues, is the set of possible outcomes obtainable from a measurement of the system's total energy. Due to its close relation to the energy spectrum and time-evolution of a system, it is of fundamental importance in most formulations of quantum theory.

The Hamiltonian is named after William Rowan Hamilton, who developed a revolutionary reformulation of Newtonian mechanics, known as Hamiltonian mechanics, which was historically important to the development of quantum physics. Similar to vector notation, it is typically denoted by

{\hat {H}}

, where the hat indicates that it is an operator. It can also be written as

H

{\check {H}}

(also from wiki...)

Magic is an ancient practice rooted in rituals, spiritual divinations, and/or cultural lineage—with an intention to invoke, manipulate, or otherwise manifest supernatural forces, beings, or entities in the natural world.^[1] It is a categorical yet often ambiguous term which has been used to refer to a wide variety of beliefs and practices, frequently considered separate from both religion and science.^[2]

Connotations have varied from positive to negative at times throughout history,^[3] Within Western culture, magic has been linked to ideas of the Other,^[4] foreignness,^[5] and primitivism;^[6] indicating that it is "a powerful marker of cultural difference"^[7] and likewise, a non-modern phenomenon.^[8] During the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries, Western intellectuals perceived the practice of magic to be a sign of a primitive mentality and also commonly attributed it to marginalised groups of people.^[7]

Aleister Crowley (1875–1947), a British occultist, defined "magick" as "the Science and Art of causing Change to occur in conformity with Will",^[9] adding a 'k' to distinguish ceremonial or ritual magic from stage magic.^[10] In modern occultism and neopagan religions, many self-described magicians and witches regularly practice ritual magic.^[11] This view has been incorporated into chaos magic and the new religious movements of Thelema and Wicca.

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Merge the two and you have my latest endeavor. I've been convinced by a StarChaser not to claim to be a witch, because I don't "live off the land". I was hurt by the notion, but I embrace it. I create with my knowledge of magick, moreso than actually PERFORMING magic(k).

Regardless of what is to come, I will be the only one to know how to do it. No lessons, no teachings. I've shared too much of myself to begin with.

Thanks, Ty!

#beseated

Mayfield's Blues 0fficial lyrics

(verse 1)

I ain't gonna kiss you no more! Every kiss just breaks my heart! Tryna break the walls apart in my apartment before the state-of-the-art comes in to start talking about how late I am to the ancient art? Ain't that about a starting pitch! Argument? Baseball or the broad I'm with?! Thinkin' 'bout all of the offseason tickets I can get. Meaning, peace of mind, when I don't believe in shit! But here I am. I gotta give. Whether it's tolerance or a lot of fibs. No, that doesn't make you look fat. No, that song isn't wack. No, that's not really crack. Whatever the problem is, I got the solution. But what happens when I ain't got my music?

(hook)

Your lips... taste like oatmeal!

Tastes like oatmeal.

Your kiss... taste like oatmeal!

Tastes like oatmeal.

Put some butter on it!

Lil sugar on it!

Put some butter on it!

(verse 2)

Call me the 8-bit threat. What I say next ain't ancient yet. "Make a mistake!" God damn! Bley-ki-ki-blek! There you go. Take your respect! Niggas ain't listen, so Blake got connected with the rim. Without touching it. Throwing it in. Griffin. Like Peter. Or is it Gilmore? Whoever's a believer, I go "deeper and deeper" like the guy needs a weave to stretch. Believe that she's right there as you write. There, Barry White. Are we married tonight? Yeah! Nightmare! But she ain't right there with me. She dares to kiss me again. And my heartbeat... going retarded. It's not getting kissed. Oh my God, bitch...!

(hook)

Your lips... taste like oatmeal!

Tastes like oatmeal.

Your kiss... taste like oatmeal!

Tastes like oatmeal.

Put some butter on it!

Lil sugar on it!

Put some butter on it!

(verse 3)

More distinction than what you're thinking. Keep it to yourself. Maybe you will blink. Be a star. Be a far place to rest, while I lay to rest ancient bets. "He ain't got it!" "He ain't Gothic!" "He ain't watch it!" Take a suggestion. Make a mistake, I say yes. Blake, to the death of the rim. It's a contest, now. All star! Now y'all all are Charles! Feelin' good, aren't y'all? Well I got this smart broad, that could take my life from all y'all... with a kiss, though. Listening to disco. Turn up the Crisco. Let it pop, till the bitch go...

(hook)

Your lips... taste like oatmeal!

Tastes like oatmeal.

Your kiss... taste like oatmeal!

Tastes like oatmeal.

Put some butter on it!

Lil sugar on it!

Put some butter on it!

^
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Imagine Curtis Mayfield using Aveeno's Oatmeal lotion to jerk off, and his 6-year old granddaughter giving him head while he's sleep. When he wakes up, she screams "Yo dick!, taste like oat-meal!"

lol based on true events.

#ImOutside!!!!!

Eminem's Evil Twin

I'm in a strange place

I feel like Ma$e when he gave up the game for his faith

I feel like I'm caged in these chains and restraints

Grimmin' every stranger in the place while I gaze into space

'Cause I'm mentally rearrangin' his face

I need a change of pace

'Cause the pace I'm workin' at's dangerous

There's nowhere to dump this anger, and thanks to this angst

I done quit chicken heads cold turkey

And started slowly roastin' 'em

'Cause that's where most of my anger is based

Fuck your feelings, I feel like I play for the Saints

I just wanna hurt you, aim for the skanks

Then aim for all these fake Kanyes, Jays, Waynes and the Drakes

I'm frustrated 'cause ain't no more N'Sync, now I'm all out of whack

I'm all out of Backstreet Boys to call out and attack

I'm going all out in this rap shit and whatever the fallout is

I'm strapped for battle, suck a duck

Crawl out the back, it's a bar fight

Prepare your arsenal

And beware of barstools flyin' through the air and bottles breakin', mirrors also

And I ain't stoppin' 'til the swear jar's full

"You done called every woman a slut, but you're forgetting Sarah, Marshall" (Palin)

Oh, my bad, slut

And next time I show up to court, I'll be naked and just wear a law suit

Judge be like, "That's sharp, how much that motherfucker cost you?

Smart-ass, you're lucky I don't tear it off you

And jump your bones, you sexy motherfucker

You're so fuckin' gravy, Marshall, I should start calling you au jus

'Cause alls you do is spit them lyrics out the wazoo"

Evil twin, take this beat now, it's all you

I believe people can change, but only for the worse

I could've changed the world if it wasn't for this verse

So satanic, K-Mart chains panic 'cause they can't even spin back the curse words

'Cause they're worse when they're reversed, motherfucker

(Rape your mother) (Kill your parents)

And these kids are like parrots

They run around the house just like terrorists

Screamin', "Fuck, shit, fuck"

Adult with a childish like arrogance

Wild ever since the day I came out, I was like, "Merits?

Fuck that, I'd rather be loud and I like swearin'"

From the first album even the gals were like, "Tight lyrics, dreamy eyes"

But my fuckin' mouth was nightmareish

And from the start of it you felt like you were a part of this

And opposition felt the opposite

Sometimes I listen and revisit them old albums

Often as I can and skim through all them bitches

To make sure I keep up with my competition (haha)

Hogger of beats, hoarder of rhymes

Borderline genius who's bored of his lines

And that sort of defines where I'm at and the way I feel now

Feel like I might just strike first, then ignore the replies

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Not only is this top-tier lyricism, but he literally is speaking to how I feel at this moment. Once again, I thank you, Eminem. If there's any way to repay you, let me know.

#beseated

Superfly Hamilton 0fficial lyrics

(verse 1)

Even though I put a curse on the myth that was looking first, "reminisce for a spell". Which hit you first? Hooked on the first like a purist. Nervous, in front of Curtis. Curtains, if The Wordsmith doesn't get it together. It's fixed in. Picture the perfect sentence. Picture perfect! Miss? Imperfection. (Ms. Imperfection) Rear end, ripped off. No need to shit or play football. Get a kickoff liftoff. I ain't talkin' about what you want me to. I'm keeping it real with me, before I die in front of you. What you want to do?

(hook)

The game I play, I play for keeps!

The games I play, I play for keeps!

Taking all that C can take,

Following the C with H!

(verse 2)

Don't play with death! You may make it miss the mystery of you. You just wanna see people respect the different view you now have. Bow to that! Yeah! People think you all down in fact. It's that! Back of your blackheads. Get remembered quickly. You don't remember shit, do you? Remind me of the kind of love that I would get. That I would give. And all I would give is all kinds of love, so y'all not minding y'all business. Allow the darkness to be my light. My sunshine. My shite. Like Nutty Professor. Ugly, when the lecture gets leveled up.

(hook)

The game I play, I play for keeps!

The games I play, I play for keeps!

Taking all that C can take,

Following the C with H!

(verse 3)

I'm not playing a memory lane game with a shotgun. I'm tapping your pockets and asking for love. Do you have a heart? Does it not drop at the sight of what you love? Then let me come up from under. Share the love. I am a villain indeed, but it's bearable to see what I love. In front of me. (Manipulation, everywhere) Don't think this is Hard Copy. This is Charles, being sloppy. Falling on top of a beat. (Manipulation, they don't care) Now what you gotta see, is all that you gotta see. Live amongst as your prophecy. Maybe you are your property. But I can see... if only thy can see...

(hook)

The game I play, I play for keeps!

The games I play, I play for keeps!

Taking all that C can take,

Following the C with H!

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I have no problem breaking down the bars, but... read for understanding.

#beseated

Live Leaks

So today was another "successful" livestream on YouTube. So "successful" that I don't want to do another one. Here's the thing... almost since day one, I've always tried to give the listener the best music possible. The change is, I started giving the listener the best ME possible. Apparently... well, OBVIOUSLY, the best ME isn't want you want. I got a request to make more music like "See & Say", and to make my music "industry standard".

I don't get it, y'all. I can't preach to you guys, 'cause then I'm not Gothic. I can't curse you guys, because I grew up Christian. I can't teach to you guys, because it's boring. I can't charm you guys, because that's gay. And when I do me and not give a fuck about what you get, you say you can't relate. Mind you, NO OTHER ARTIST LISTENS TO THEIR FANS THE WAY I LISTEN TO Y'ALL!!! So... 98% of my music is free, whatever you pay for you get AS PROMISED, I got back into the music business JUST TO GIVE YOU AN ALL-WRITTEN ALBUM... y'all just don't appreciate what I do.

So here I am, realizing and dealing with all this in my last live (1/19/2024). With all these feelings of resentment, bitterness, and virtual hatred, I saved my own life again and leaked "Compliant" from Vigilante. No real response, and no response was necessary. Just know that I have all this documented in my head and on YouTube.

I see how y'all niggas are. I'll take the loss.

#beseated

Discipline (likely, a revisit)

This year will be an exercise in discipline. For you and for me.

Outside of Lil Wayne, I became famous/infamous for flooding the marketplace. It's not ordinarily recommended, as your best work might go unnoticed. But it can work, especially if nothing is to come from... really, anyone else.

Like I said. I let off the Katrina dams already. I also pioneered the "surprise" release. Instead of oversaturation this time, I'm aiming to be more strategic. And as the year passes, you'll hear continuity in the themes of the music.

I couldn't be more excited.

Shouts to Mike and Stik for their review of Hypergoth!. That album was specifically for StarChasers. So was Electronic Christmas, but Hprgth!. is where it started.

Stay tuned! I go live later...

#beseated

Beats By Blu

Since "Negative", Blu and I have been keeping in touch. Lately he's been sending me incredible beat packs of his. I like 'em. You don't have to put a gun to my head and tell me to rap to 'em. They're dope. I won't leak any, as he's a bit bashful about his work, but I co-sign. He's nice.

In regards to me, I have SEVERAL instrumental albums lined up. Beats I deem "too ill" for me to rap to. Definitely worth a listen (as well as a good wait).

#beseated

Reality, checkered

Here's something I noticed about today's rap fan. They like to be taken places. Whether it's on a high speed chase or a drug trip, the modern rap fan wants to escape reality

But the heart of rap IS reality. From NWA to Fresh Prince and Jazzy Jeff to Wu Tang to Tribe. Stories were told, and aggression was used to drive home how true the stories are. Even Lil Wayne tells stories about a reality he either lives or is exposed to.

My more recent music (2012-present) is aggressive, yet self-defeating. Boisterous, yet gentle. Desperate, yet calm. My confidence is there, but wanes when I think about the criticism.

One thing I want to address with Stik and Mike (StarChaser Podcast) is, don't worry whether or not the songs are written. Treat the fact like it's icing on the musical cake. Dig for the substance. I have MULTIPLE entendres in my music. And the definitions are within.

Just believe.

It's really magic!

...and I'm really talented.

#beseated

American Monarchy 0fficial lyircs

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(verse 1)

I can't get out! Fro or not? You know it's hot! I wear it out. My whereabouts you ought not care about. It has nothing to do with you. And when it does, it's ugly. Trust me. I'm your fuckin' buddy. Not a fuck buddy. Not a fuck boy. I adjust to noise, because it's just noise. What to do? What to destroy? Still, it's my choice. A Deutsche account for the figures. Boy, I'm about to get DEEP up in the river! Sorry, Nile, but I got this sorry Atari style that got everybody partying wild! Why is it sorry? It's unapologetic. It bruises you. Musically. Yeah!

(Hook)

I'm The King of America!
I'm The King of America!
Whether you like it or not, I got my own crown!

My own crown!

Whether you like it or not, I got my own crown!

My own crown!

(verse 2)

Stereo! I clear my throat! Do the Dougie on a beat. 'Cause you love it!, with the heat! What do I come with, if it's not heat? So cold, put it in ice with SoCo! Maybe a lemon and Corona. Then again, I'm a loner. That's a party beverage. Hardly the beverage that Charles wanna sip. 'Cause all of this shit is an argument with me. Don't start with me. I started it... with me. Could I lead like me? Why does everybody wanna be like me? So disciplined. Most MCs say I don't get it in. Correct they are!, with the Yoda speech. Next to Charles, nobody! Can't you see? Ungh!

(Hook)

I'm The King of America!
I'm The King of America!
Whether you like it or not, I got my own crown!

My own crown!

Whether you like it or not, I got my own crown!

My own crown!

(verse 3)

A peaceful nigga. Sorry. A peaceful figure. Guard me. Hardly a bar from me. A bar is Charles, you see. Nothing but options to get you fucked up. Talkin' shit just might get you fucked up. Walk in the crib? Might get you fucked up. I'm not gonna sit with you. I'll get you fucked up. Not even kidding with you. I'll get you fucked up. This is fucked up. The shit is just tough. I gotta be tough! Call it defense! The reason people ain't breathing! They bleed all the time like a period never-ending. Seriously. It's clever, isn't it? How to make it stop? Put a stopper in it! I gotchu, bebe! Ungh!

(Hook)

I'm The King of America!
I'm The King of America!
Whether you like it or not, I got my own crown!

My own crown!

Whether you like it or not, I got my own crown!

My own crown!

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Ben Jayne asked me what this song is about, if it's not just a random lo-fi freestyle over a cool beat. Basically, I'm introducing the concept of me being King to the masses. Factor in the fact that I'm Black, former child actor/model, full time musician, and I just served 2 years. If countless other rappers can feel regal after serving sentences for far more heinous crimes and receive a certain type of wealth, than I am entitled to feeling like a King for surviving all that I've been through.

And my crown is my Kufi.

I feel like I shouldn't have had to explain that, though.

#beseated

God Damn!

Since the "Junkiewow" post, I've gotten feedback from many people saying they will not be supporting my habit, thus no longer sending me funds. They also say that they are disappointed and have less respect for me, saying that my "relationship" with drugs is "bullshit".

Look. I can't tell you where to go. I am lucky that you spent time listening, and I'm glad you heard me out (or in this case, read what I had to say). I have no defense. All I know is I have an abundance of freedom after 2 years of being locked down (granted on the outside), and I've never had to fight depression this hard. I used out of depression. That's why I call my addiction(s) a relationship. I feel more charismatic whilst on a substance. Except weed. I'm definitely deadpan when I smoke.

Still, don't judge me. I didn't judge you. At all. And you hide behind "facts", so there's nothing to judge you on. Just know that I am very perceptive. So much so, I try to dull my senses with narcotics.

But it's okay! I asked them to up my psych meds, so I will be very under control. Subdued, even. And nothing will affect me. I'm not saying you turned your back on me. You're not even a fallen StarChaser. You just have high hopes for me and I let you down. My only prayer is that you never long for something without knowing what it can do to you.

I haven't been going live in the new year. I don't feel personable enough. I might go on in a little while. Like after this post. I just don't feel it anymore. I just wanna make music and watch your reaction to it. I LOVE the StarChaser Central podcast. They thoroughly dissect every project, and offer INFORMED OPINIONS. It's been a while since I've seen those...

Aight... without further ado, I'm gonna go live.
See you there!!!

#beseated

Judgement for the wicked.

I've been having intense conversations about God and magick. I really have no defense in my stance, other than my own personal relationship with God. If you remember, I asked that God trust me with Tarot, Witchcraft and Alchemy (TWA). The music was a burnt offering unto God.

It's funny how everyone believes in blessings and miracles, but no one believes I have a personal relationship with God. As uptight as He/She can be, God is radical about ministry. He'll take his people any way She can get them.

So when people tell me how impactful I am, all I can say is...

To God be the glory!

To know God is to know Satan and condemn The Devil.

#beseated

Junkiewow

"If you wanna be a junkie, wow."
-C. Mayfield, "Freddie's Dead"

Curtis Mayfield's music has impacted me A LOT over the years. I don't know, it's like I catch the lyrics when I first hear them, but over time it just became/becomes inescapable.

Drugs and I have a love/hate relationship. I've tried it all. Ashamed to say it, even Crack. I'm always depressed when I do 'em, and I'm always happy when I'm on 'em. When the high goes, I can only hope to have some art to show for the good time I had. My drug of choice is Heroin. I'm reminded of it every time I see CYoung. He wanted to stage a "beef" between us, which included an Instagram rap battle. The first thing out of his mouth was my heroin addiction. From that day moving forward, I always looked at him different.

I guess I clung to Heroin because it feels like a mother's love. Warm, gives you a cuddly feeling, and it promises not to leave you in the same position it found you in. The promise is in the jokes it tells. If you're in tune with yourself/your body when you're high, you'll catch all the hidden puns in the drug. As much as it is a depressant, I always have the best jokes when I'm on H. And don't be fooled. Heroin does not make you a better songwriter. You just get DEEP in the rhythm/bass when you're on it.

I've calmed down over the years. Though I've dipped into some hard stuff in recent months, I've only been on Weed. I find that I can navigate the bullshit I'm in BETTER when I have some Weed in my system. Of course, I sleep heavily in public and snore loudly... but that's besides the point.

I know I gotta do better. And I am. I'm constantly working on improving my craft. Not just music. Writing, marketing, promotion... everything is in conjunction. I'm proud of my progress. I could be out robbing people for a quick fix at a dispo. I could catch a body over a wallet. Like, I feel it. I feel the rage of wanting to use. But I got my blog to vent on, my music to create with, and my StarChasers to remain alive for. I'll be okay.

I plan to drop the remastured "Hypergoth!" some time this year. Let the remastured "Electronic Christmas" serve as an example of the damage I'm about to do.

If you don't see the correlation between Goth Subculture and Curtis Mayfield, you're listening wrong. For Black people, meet the voice that narrated our darkest hours. For White people, meet the man with the heart of gold that won you over. The Black Bobby Caldwell, if you well... no one knew Mayfield was Black until they saw him.

Hate better.

#ImOutside!!!

Black tastebuds

Last night, I took a departure from my regular listening (Eminem, J Dilla, Madlib, etc.) and got into some modern day Hardcore. My man Tyler said that even Indie Rock was disappointing him, so I went to the most Indie place on the web to find some new music...

SoundCloud.

I see that Djs are taking the place of producers. And these modern Hardcore DJs spare NO ONE. I guess you gotta know about the craft to get into the debate. But yeah. I heard some INCREDIBLE music last night. Some of it was labeled as 1994, which killed hope. Regardless, I had a great time listening to SoundCloud last night.

3rd Eye Magic may be working on another new project. It's all up to Chris. I've been giving him free reign over my production for the last few joints. I simply asked him if he could take direction on this one. He hasn't gotten back to me at the time this post is being written, but I have good faith in my 3rd Eye brother.

I didn't forget about you, Indigo Children! New music dropping soon. Just want to make a royal entrance first.

I'll be cooking up today. Not sure about the future of me going live. It's always fun, but it takes a lot to do it. In fact, it takes a lot to be famous. It takes a lot, and it takes a lot out of you. I gotta think about what's best for me. And what's best for me, right now, is a damn Gatorade. I'm TRAGICALLY dehydrated. Maybe once I get my health back up I'll go live some more. Until then, just watch for the playlist.

More to be seen, more to be said.

#beseated

Children of #TheKingdom

I listen to The Universe. That's how I found out I have children. However, until their mother's reveal to me themselves that my children are in existence, I don't claim on paperwork that I have children. Still, I have paternal instincts, and there are key signs that certain individuals are my children.

I've named names before. I'm more interested in the REAL names, not the stage names.

I thought their mother named them Danjer and Crazh, but no. It's Danger (with a -g) and Crash (with an -s). Tomorrow is definitely here. So is Thelonious, Toddler, Titus and Tokya. Once again, it's up to their respective mothers to clarify or debunk.

Still, I love them to no end. I'm running out of words to describe my love. Bear with me.

#KingCharles!!!

(BY OVERWHELMING DEMAND) Christian Human 0fficial lyrics

(Verse 1)

Can't find my way. blinded by the way I find a stray in my behind when I walk away. Peace is like, "Do you really need to fight?" My only reply is the only guy who would say no. Nigh. "Jesus Christ!" So I reply to the beef. I take the pain and apply it to thee. Feel it with a DeadMan'sPunch. Dead Man's Strength. Detlef Schrempf. Y'all already heard it. Let the three be the history I make, lest it be something else for thee. Helping you with your ex... damn. My vents is helping. Gotta invent a message. Never left it. Get me. Melting.

(Hook)